Navigating Parenting a Pre-Teen: My Journey with Maanvi

Maanvi is officially 11 going on 16. Over the last few months, I’ve seen so many changes in her that I now look at her and see a more mature, grown-up version of my little girl. And honestly? I’m not ready for this.

She turned 11 this year, and the day before her birthday was the first time I truly felt the shift into pre-teen territory. I had booked her in for a simple hair wash, cut, and blow-dry, but she asked if she could also have her hair straightened—for the first time. The request was reasonable, so I agreed. What I didn’t expect was how much straighter hair would change her entire look.

For years, I’ve battled with her short baby hairs at the front of her head—the stubborn little wisps that never grew enough to join the main ponytail I always did for school. We’ve used clips, bands, and all sorts of tricks, but nothing truly worked. And then suddenly, with straightened hair, those wild little strands transformed into the perfect side fringes framing her face. She looked so grown up, I was honestly shocked.

And then came the moment that truly hit me—five minutes later, she’s striking poses and taking selfies on her phone at the salon. That was just the beginning.

The Big Changes I’ve Noticed

Over the past few months, Maanvi has grown so much—not just physically, but emotionally and mentally too. Here are some of the big changes I’ve noticed:

1. Watching More Mature Shows

Gone are the days of Disney cartoons on repeat. Now it’s Wednesday on Netflix and episodes of Doctor Who. Shows with more complex storylines, characters, and themes. Part of me loves watching with her and seeing her thoughts and opinions develop. But another part of me aches, because it’s a reminder that the innocent little girl who once loved Peppa Pig is growing up.

2. Getting into Looking Good and Makeup

She’s more conscious about her appearance now—choosing outfits carefully, experimenting with hairstyles, and even showing interest in skincare and makeup. We’re not at the full glam stage yet, but lip balms, hair accessories, and little hints of mascara have entered the conversation.

3. Emotional Highs and Lows

Ah, the moods. One moment we’re laughing, and the next she’s upset for reasons even she can’t explain. I’m learning that this is all part of the hormonal rollercoaster. It’s challenging, but I’m trying to give her space while reminding her that I’m always here to listen.

4. Wanting Independence

She wants to do things on her own—go out with friends, have private chats, and sometimes, just close the door and have time to herself. I get it. I was that girl once. But letting go of that constant “mum mode” is hard.

The Practical Stuff – Preparing Her for What’s Next

As much as I want to hold on to her being little, I know my role now is to guide her into this next stage of life. So here’s what I’m focusing on:

• Mobile Phone Safety: Teaching her the importance of online safety, privacy, and being responsible with social media and messaging.
• Basic Food Skills: Simple cooking basics like making toast, boiling pasta, or even a cup of tea. Life skills matter!
• Secondary School Prep: Talking about what to expect, building her confidence, and making sure she feels ready for the big change ahead.

My Feelings About Her Becoming a Teenager

If I’m honest, it’s a mix of pride and panic. I’m proud of the confident, curious, and strong young girl she’s becoming. But part of me is scared—scared of the world she’s stepping into, scared of her getting hurt, and scared of how fast time is flying.

Parenting through this stage feels like balancing on a tightrope—giving enough freedom for her to grow while still being her safety net. I know I can’t stop her from growing up, but I can make sure that as she does, she knows she’s loved, supported, and understood.

So here we are—one foot in childhood, one in teenagehood. And me? Just trying to keep up